
It has now been 20 years since I have left Salem and I have tried to put the past behind me but with encouragement from friends and family, I am finally ready to tell my side of the story to help me move on. It all begins with my affair with John proctor.
I did truly love John proctor. I am not trying to defend my actions but I did want the best for him and at the time I believed that was to get rid of Elizabeth. When I was dismissed from the Proctors service, I was angered and filled with rage. Since I was no longer living with the Proctors, it was no longer possible for me to try and persuade Proctor to run off with me and the only way I could think possible to get Proctor to love me was to kill Elizabeth.
I will admit now that I was a major cause in the start of the witch trials and while I don't believe I am responsible to what happened to many men and women, I do realize that I was a a major cause of the start of the witch trials. I am ready to admit, I did convince Tituba to make me a charm to kill Elizabeth. I know that I did lie in the courts and I hope you understand that I was a young immature, selfish, and scared girl who decided to protect herself over others.
When I had realized what I had done, lying to the court, I knew I could not return to normal life. I had admitted that I knew that John proctor will never love me and will always side with his wife but I was not ready to admit to performing witchcraft. But being a scared young girl, I did not wish to die from being accused as a witch, so I did the only thing I could think of, getting as many people to protect me and simply denying the charges by accusing others. I realize now that I was very threatening but I was young and did not know what else to do.
After the witch trials had spun out of control, I knew I had to get out. I could no longer take part in all the lies that jailed and hung many others, and I needed to run away. So I took Mary lewis with me and we left Salem for good, I have now built a life for myself and have a loving family and many friends. And to anyone reading this, know that I am truly sorry for my actions and what they caused in Salem and know that I am trying to become a better person and being truthful to myself and others.
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